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Sky Joust: The Purple Onion vs. The Pestilence

Evil-doers, get out your hankies: a new superhero will make you weep like infants!

For generations, Dodoville has suffered at the hands of brutal gang lords. Fortunately, Victor Cumin, son of a news media mogul, has developed the skills and technology to undermine their authority. Armed with his electrified quarterstaff, he breaks gangsters until they cry - then posts the blubbering to YouTube! This humiliation tactic has earned him a nickname: the Purple Onion.

But wait! Ancient enemies have returned. An elite order of rogue knights, using sophisticated new lancing weapons and mechanically enhanced horses, have sworn to reclaim their honor from the city that drove them out centuries ago.

Can the Purple Onion make them cry for mommy?


The Killbug Eulogies

Disemboweled by the razor scythes of a six-foot mantis, lobotomized by hungry larvae, or roasted on an exoskeletal skewer: these are only a few of the disgusting ways to die in humanity's hopeless war against giant space insects. Deployed on a brutal bug planet without a chaplain, a depleted infantry unit has entrusted its eulogy duties to the soldier standing closest at time of death. Somehow this rotten privilege keeps falling to Pvt. Timothy Archon.

Archon's speeches explore the strange obsessions the men have developed since the war began--from archiving killbug death psalms to trying to seduce the enemy. Did these manias somehow redeem them, or only bring them quicker to their messy ends?

But more importantly: Why does Archon keep having such terrible luck?